Ol' Lady [bzzzzgrrrl]

It's that time of year again, when my windows are open and the neighborhood kids are outside.
Just overheard this in my backyard, while I sat in the sunroom, out of view:
(wheel grinding noise)
"Quit it! Get away from there! [exasperated noise] Do we even know the people who own that property? No. They [mumble mumble mumble]."
Indeed I do, kid. Indeed I do.

The Doogie Howser line always works on strippers

This delights me. Very, very much.

Tea-ed off

I can't be the only person simultaneously amused and horrified by the sudden use of the word "teabagging" everywhere, right? I mean, regardless of who the teabaggers are and what they're trying to accomplish, it's funny, right? And also shocking?

No, of course I can't. (Arguably not safe for work, depending on how much more gross-slang-savvy your coworkers are than the Republican party.)

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

This one is definitely less safe for work than the one above.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	M - Th 11p / 10c
IndigNation! Populist Uprising '09 - The Enragening
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Economic Crisis Political Humor

(Important side note: If you don't understand what I am talking about, please do not ask in the comments. I will in no way elaborate.)
(Less important side note: Ellen Degeneres once gave me a year's supply of teabags. For reals.)

Callus remarks

Warning: This post not for the easily grossed-out. It is perfect, however, for health inspectors, ladies with pretty feet, and health inspectors with pretty feet.

Those shavey things sometimes used in a pedicure? Are miraculous to me. For those of you who don't get pedicures, or who get them in the wrong states, they're a razor blade with a handle, pretty much, that shaves calluses and rough skin off your feet. They are apparently called "callus shavers." Which makes sense. For me, the callus shaver is the point of a pedicure, in fact. I can paint my own toenails, but I am afraid to shave the rough skin off my feet. That's a razor blade in there, people.

I have been told (though I cannot attest to the veracity of the information) that they are legal some places (including Idaho and Virginia), but not in all (including, apparently, New Hampshire). Bzh mentioned recently that they are not legal in North Carolina or Maryland.

So here's your question: How does a person find out what states they are legal in? I live so close to so many states that there must be somewhere around here I can get a decent pedicure. Right?

Anyone happen to know, for the benefit of all my readers, where that info lives? Or know, for my benefit, whether that is a service offered in any reputable (ah, hell, even semi-reputable) salon in the New England states?

UPDATE 4/15 4:27 p.m. Many thanks to bzh herself for finding us just what we were looking for. It seems Vermont is the place, for me anyway. Woohoo, and may you other seekers find a salon near you.

Love in the workplace

So, one of my work buddies just stopped by my office to say hello. After some quick chat about work stuff, on her way out, she said, "Hey, what was up with that crazy post on your blog?"

I had no idea what she was talking about.

She reminded me that over the weekend, I'd told someone I loved him or her. I laughed and asked if she clicked on the link. She said she did click on the link and saw that some anonymous person had said "I love you too," at which point she decided it was way too personal to get involved in.

"No," I said. "Did you click the link that was in the post?"

"There was a link in the post?"

"Yep," I said.

"But then it was your Facebook status, too."

"Right," I said. "There was a link there, too."

"I need to call [bzzzzgrrrl]," she said abruptly, which confused me, but I quickly figured out that she meant she needed to call another friend of ours; she was just flustered enough that she was getting names confused. And the reason she had needed to call that other friend of ours was that they had been speculating about my apparent sudden falling in love, and my apparent sudden willingness to discuss it here before either of them had even heard there was a candidate.

There are two potential takeaways here:

• During the time that I have had this blog, I have both been in love and not been in love, and you haven't heard much about either here. You won't the next time, either, unless it gets so serious that my real-life friends will already be well aware of what's going on.
• If I post something super-cryptic and very exciting here, look for a link. If you don't see one, ask. There is almost certainly a logical explanation.

Ten minutes late

I love you.