So, sure is a lot of nature around here.
Sunday morning, I was driving around a little. On my first twenty-minute drive, I spotted:
- An enormous live deer in someone's front yard, very close to the road
- Two live cows, with a person but untethered, ambling up the road (Yeah, yeah, domesticated cattle aren't "nature." You still don't see 'em wandering the streets of Arlington, Virginia.)
- A dead porcupine in the road, because quills in my tires would be very bad
- Another dead porcupine in the road, because quills in my tires would be very bad
- Four little creatures that I could not identify in the dark, but that seemed first like possum and then like geese, walk single-file into my neighbor's front yard
- A live skunk in the middle of the sidewalk, preparing to spray me
I will say that I can move very quickly across a street under those circumstances, and I am just lucky that there were no cars coming. I did not get sprayed, which is also good, because getting sprayed would have involved me walking back to Main Street, to the convenience store, because I obviously would not have wanted to walk home to get my car, and hoping against hope that Cumberland Farms sells tomato juice in large quantities.
I was in no mood.
5 comments:
Actually, the tomato juice thing is a myth. So, good thing you didn't get sprayed. :-)
Remind me to tell you my "getting sprayed by a skunk and subsequent tomato juice bath" story. Again.
Interesting.
Cousin, I do now vaguely remember that you have a tomato juice bath story, but do not remember what it is. I will look forward to hearing it.
icanhasyarn, it is good indeed. Because here is what would have happened:
I would have gone into the convenience store reeking, and, assuming they had any, I would have paid an exorbitant amount of money for all the tomato juice they had.
I would have bathed in it, and thought it kind of worked.
I would have rinsed off and gone to bed, stinking up my bed.
I would have woken up this morning realizing that it had not worked, and would have gone to the Internet looking for an alternative.
I would have found the one you linked to and realized quickly that I had plenty of baking soda but no hydrogen peroxide.
I would have had to stink up my car to get to a drug store reeking.
I would have employed that method and then been both late and too exhausted for work, but desperate to get out of my stinky house.
Oh, it all would have been very bad.
You would also now be a peroxide blonde. The skunk smell particularly lingers in the hair - which being close to your nose, and everyone else's, makes it even more noticable, especially when damp or humid.
The thing about the tomato juice, to give a way part of my long story, is consider how MUCH you would need for a bath. Consider also that unlike water it does not flow nicely warmed from a tap.
This means you would be bathing and shivering in a very small amount of cold tomato juice. Or, you might have friends, amused at your expense, heating panfuls of tomato juice to pour on your reeking head as you squat in a chilly bathtub.
I disagree with you, CityMouse. . .I've seen plenty of bull on the streets of Arlington. . .and right here in this office on plenty of occasions.
Sorry, that's the best I've got on a Tuesday afternoon.
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