AF knows me well enough to know that I really only wear about two different outfits. HF will come to know that soon enough, but really, it's a moment of realization I like to delay until people already know that I am awesome enough to compensate for wearing the same clothes all the time.
So on the second evening in the space of a few days I was to see AF and HF together, I called AF.
"This will sound like a strange question," I said, "but was I wearing my blue sweater on Friday?"
"Yes," she said.
"Thanks," I said, glad to know that I would be wearing the other outfit that evening.
"Not the one you always wear," she said, and I was momentarily stunned.
"Do I have another blue sweater?" I asked.
"Not the cardigan. This one's darker, and wool," she said.
I knew immediately what sweater she meant, and resolved to wear the blue sweater I do always wear.
I am sorry we are this far into this story and nothing interesting has happened. A heads-up: Nothing interesting will happen in the rest of it, either.
But I went to my room and looked at my sweaters, and realized that I don't have two blue sweaters. I have six. I tend only to wear the two frumpiest.
Morals of this story:
- I do too have something to wear.
- My already-limited fashion sense has gone to hell in the last year.
- I should make an effort to buy some non-blue sweaters, I guess.
- If someone had a business where they delivered Pop Tarts and Diet Coke to me in my office, they wouldn't get rich, but they'd get excellent tips, and they'd be making what I like to think of as a real difference in the world. Consider that.
8 comments:
soo does this mean you’re going to shop??
I have the same wardrobe only it now consists of mostly black, turtlenecks & sweaters and yes, I think through when I wore what to what and not to wear it too consecutively to the same group-you are not alone.
On the not so subtle dear Santa request-(as if they would buy you dc and pt and ask for you to pay for it!)knowing those who know you, you will be sick to death of dc and pt in a week you will be so overwhelmed and if anyone's interested...I too have a penchant for dc, m&m's (peanut)and...airheads.
oh and pps. you haven't mentioned repetitive jewelry wearing....
PJ
If there was a decoder key mailed out prior to the publication of this cryptic entry, I did not receive it.
Despite the lack of anything interesting happening in this story, I have to tell you I enjoyed the telling of it immensely. Plus, I no longer feel quite as bad about my own less-than-inspirational wardrobe decisions of late.
A certain wife of mine -- and let me be clear that I think this is really cute -- asked me to be on the lookout for Mork & Mindy suspenders. (That is, wide rainbow suspenders like Mork always wore.) For my part, when I finish going bald, I plan to start wearing a Charlie Brown shirt.
Knowing this certain wife, I definately think the rainbow suspenders would be fab! However would the balding part make you more like Mindy's folicle challenged Dad? Besides you're way too tall to be like chuck!
I wonder which of my balding friends named Mike that was. One seems more likely to start wearing a Charlie Brown shirt, the other's wife seems more likely to wear the suspenders. Hm.
In any case, I have rainbow suspenders somewhere, from when I was Mork for Halloween a few years ago, and if I find them, I will offer them to all the Mikes I know.
So, you collect blue sweaters? Good information to have just prior to Christmas. I'll let the rest of the family know.
VERY funny!
Post a Comment